A good way to be unhappy is to imagine that everyone is interested in what is happening in one’s life. However, in reality, most people are too busy with their own lives to care about what is happening in other people’s lives. This makes one unnecessarily self-conscious and anxious.
Psychologists have named this way of thinking, where one’s mind wrongly makes one think that everyone is focusing on him or her, the “spotlight effect.”
Below is a short example of using the spotlight effect to make oneself unhappy.
Rachel works in a large office with many co-workers. She recently underwent a divorce and was worried that everyone in the office was talking about her and judging her actions. Rachel was so concerned about facing her colleagues that she even decided to take some days off work.
However, when Rachel eventually returned to work, the reality was much different from what she had imagined. Most of her colleagues were sympathetic and supportive of her. After initially talking about it, everyone had moved on to talking about other things. The spotlight effect had made Rachel worry and unhappy.
As you have seen in the above example, a good way to be unhappy is to think that the world revolves around you!